Friday, October 4, 2024

This is as low as I've ever felt.


I'm 53 years old and single and have dealt with depression most of my life. There were a couple of times that I came close to attempting suicide and a couple of other times that I told people who were working to destroy my life that I was going to do it...wound up in the hospital the last time. What kept me from attempting anything wasn't that...it was my cats...I wasn't going to abandon them. 
Last week I lost my job after someone slandered me and got a "witness" who wasn't even there to back him up. I had had a couple of shouting matches with other employees in the past and I was in counseling the last few months. But after nearly 26 1/2 years in which I did more than anyone in the plant, I was tossed aside like trash because of a lie. There hasn't been a day yet that I haven't broken down sobbing uncontrollably. I've signed up with job recruiters and even have a medical exam today for one possible job which I may not be a good fit for at first. But I'm doing what I can to get work so I don't have to dip into savings anytime soon. However, the grief of my situation isn't going away and I think that if I didn't have a pair of feline children who I love, I would already be getting ready to end it all. As it is, I know that if something ever happened to my boys, I would be dead myself within a week. They're my only family left and I don't see friends more than once or twice a year.

Sunday, May 19, 2024

Dissecting all the idiotic and disgusting things in Butker's speech

"Things like abortion, IVF, surrogacy, euthanasia, as well as a growing support for degenerate cultural values in media, all stem from the pervasiveness of disorder"
Abortion is a hot button topic and thankfully his hatred of women having the rights to their own bodies is in the minority.
IVF and surrogacy are supported by both sides of the aisle. For someone who seems to place a high value on having children, this is a curious thing for him to attack.
Euthanasia is something that isn't taken lightly...for people whose lives are essentially over and only want to exit life with dignity. Does he favor suffering?
Disorder...the way he said it is troubling. You can't have total order in society...unless you try to force it in an authoritarian state.

"Our own nation is led by a man who publicly and proudly proclaims his Catholic faith, but at the same time is delusional enough to make the Sign of the Cross during a pro- abortion rally. He has been so vocal in his support for the murder of innocent babies that I'm sure to many people it appears that you can be both Catholic and pro-choice"
1... there's no such thing as a pro-abortion rally. Pro choice is not remotely the same thing. You can both be disgusted by abortion but also be disgusted by the prospect of a government telling someone what they can do with their own bodies because of their biology. Telling women that they don't have the right to control their own bodies is akin to slavery.
2...you can be Catholic and pro-choice 
This paragraph is filled with dishonesty 

"Not the deadly sin sort of pride that has an entire month dedicated to it,"
People need to get over the idiotic idea that being born differently is a sin...and anyone who can't accept that sexuality isn't a choice sounds like the flat earthers. People like to use the Bible as an excuse for their bigotry...and they're not much different from the people who used it to defend slavery.


"For the ladies present today, congratulations on an amazing accomplishment. You should be proud of all that you have achieved to this point in your young lives. I want to speak directly to you briefly because I think it is you, the women, who have had the most diabolical lies told to you. How many of you are sitting here now about to cross this stage and are thinking about all the promotions and titles you are going to get in your career? Some of you may go on to lead successful careers in the world, but I would venture to guess that the majority of you are most excited about your marriage and the children you will bring into this world."
While it's true that a lot of women are more fulfilled by becoming a homemaker than by anything else, and that's wonderful for them...it doesn't apply to every woman. Some have no interest in it and that's great for them as well. His "diabolical lies" statement is misogynistic... talking down to the women who had just finished 4 years of hard work to get their degrees...many in the hope that those degrees will assist them in careers that will make their lives so that they aren't dependent on finding a husband.
Also, it's interesting that with his focus on women and marriage and children, he said nothing on the same level towards the men...

"Be unapologetic in your masculinity, fighting against the cultural emasculation of men"
The bigotry, the dishonesty, the misogyny, and the idiocy in his speech makes him far from an expert in masculinity...maybe he should step back and learn from teammates like Travis Kelse.

Sunday, December 31, 2023

Movies 2023

 2/17 Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania...wasn't as good as the 1st 2 films but I enjoyed it and I loved Kathryn Newton as the new Cassie Lang

3/10 65...watched it on streaming...Adam Driver played a space pilot from a distant planet who crash lands on Earth....65 million years ago...not long before the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs hit. He and the lone survivor among his passengers, a little girl who doesn't share his language, must escape the planet while escaping the dinosaurs....I thought it was pretty well done

3/17 Shazam Fury Of The Gods...watched it on streaming and it was mostly forgettable

5/5 Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 3...If you saw it and didn't love it, I question if you have a soul

6/16 The Flash...better than I expected but still extremely flawed...Michael Keaton and Sasha Callie were great in their roles but Ezra Miller wasn't believable

6/30 Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny..obviously not as good as the 1st trio of movies but far superior to the Crystal Skull movie...I liked it better than Temple Of Doom myself

7/21 Barbie...watched it on streaming and it was silly...but it also had a good message behind it...to not let yourself be defined by your relationships, your job, or how others see you

9/18 Blue Beetle..watched it on streaming and it was actually one of the better DCEU movies introducing Jamie Reyes and his family

11/10 The Marvels...loved it....gave us a look at what Carol Danvers was doing between leaving Earth in the 90s and coming back after Fury paged her...brought her and Lt Trouble back together and brought Kamala Khan and her family out of New Jersey and into the greater MCU

12/22 Aquaman and The Lost Kingdom...while it wasn't on the level of the original...which was the 2nd best of all DCEU films..it was still outstanding but I do hope that deleted scenes are released when the movie comes to streaming because Mera and Atlanna barely showed up in the movie that showed up in theaters

Sunday, January 1, 2023

Wing sauces

When I first discovered wings, I was eating butter and garlic primarily but soon graduated to medium and eventually started cooking my own. I haven't ordered out for wings since before I went into the service and generally make my own sauce....just Frank's, butter, and garlic powder. When Wingfest started in 2002, I started experiencing a wider variety of sauces and the best I ever had was the Buffalo Bliss from Parrot's Cay in Grand Forks, ND but I haven't had those since late 2014. In late 2021, I decided to start getting other wing sauces from the store to check out different flavors. I make wings once a week usually so I've been making some with my regular sauce and some with a store bought sauce. I'll be updating this as I review new sauces


Sweet Baby Ray's was just ok...nothing special about it
2 1/2 wings out of 5



Outstanding! Good zing but not overpowering the excellent flavor
5 wings



Also outstanding. A little stronger zing than the Frank's but doesn't overpower the flavor...not as garlicy as the Frank's
4 1/2 wings



Surprisingly is very good and thick so it sticks to the wing. Stronger zing to it than the above but a little less flavor
4 wings



Stay tuned



Stay tuned



Stay tuned

Thursday, December 29, 2022

A look ahead at 2023 movies

February 17 Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania...the 3rd in the franchise features Kang The Conquerer as the main villain and a new Cassie Lang portrayed by Supernatural alum Kathryn Newton

March 17 Shazam! Fury of the Gods....don't know if I'll see it in the theater but I'll see it once it hits HBO Max

May 5 Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3...they're saying this is the final film with this group of Guardians and rumor is that one of the Guardians won't survive

June 16 The Flash...we'll see if it actually hits theaters finally...keeps getting delayed...some rumor have said it would focus around the Flashpoint storyline and both Ben Affleck and Michael Keaton are supposed to appear as their versions of Batman

June 30 Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny...Harrison Ford's final movie as Henry Jones Jr...set in 1969 with the space race as the backdrop...Sallah is the only one who returns with Indy from past films

July 28 The Marvels...sequel to Captain Marvel and features Carol, Ms Marvel, Monica "Lt Trouble" Rambeau, Fury, and Goose....Carol, Kamala, and Monica keep swapping places when they use their powers and they must find out why

August 18 Blue Beetle...another I may not see in the theaters but it centers on the DC Comics character

September 22 The Expendables 4...haven't seen any of them in the theaters but they're always entertaining and exciting

October 6 Kraven The Hunter...centered on Spiderman's enemy not set in the MCU but in the Sonyverse along with the Venom movies and Morbius....some have said these movies are in the same universe as the Amazing Spiderman movies with Andrew Garfield

December 20 Ghostbusters 4...a little over 2 years since Ghostbusters Afterlife with little details available but it's supposed to be back in NYC....with Winston as a key figure as well as Egon's grandkids....Vigo may be returning

December 25 Aquaman and The Lost Kingdom...was supposed to be released a year sooner but Covid and other issues have pushed back the release....little is known except that Black Manta, a secondary villain in the 1st film, will be the primary villain in this one. There's been talk of reshoots and rewrites to remove Amber Heard from the movie and this may be Jason Momoa's last run as Aquaman so a recasting might not happen for Mera. Ben Affleck is said to be returning as Bruce Wayne

Monday, December 26, 2022

A look back at 2022 movies

March 4-The Batman..had its moments and Colin Farrel as the Penguin was ok...but Paul Dano was a terrible Riddler, IMO and Zoe Kravitz as Catwoman threw herself at Batman way too easily it seemed. Gotham I thought had the best versions of Penguin and Riddler and Anne Hathaway was my favorite Catwoman

May 6-Dr Strange and The Multiverse of Madness...was mindblowing though I will say I was disappointed that Wanda went so dark...I had hoped that the events of WandaVision had straightened her out

May 27-Top Gun Maverick....what can be said that hasn't been said already? Maybe have said it was better than the 1986 original and while I won't go that far, it was damn close. The mission was predictable but well-done and the callbacks to the original were plentiful without taking over the narrative

June 10-Jurassic World Dominion...I loved Beta and the interactions between the cast of the original Jurassic Park and the newer stars but the focus on locusts was a terrible storyline, IMO. What makes the Jurassic movies amazing has been the dinosaurs....insects should be a side character instead of a focus

July 8-Thor Love and Thunder I honestly found this to be the worst of the Thor movies and I hope Chris Hemsworth gets his wish..to get a 5th film with a more serious script. Outside of Jane's cancer, it seemed this was more of a comedy than any MCU film....even the Guardians original

October 21-Black Adam....I'm not that familiar with the character but I thought it was really good. Pierce Brosnan made an outstanding Doctor Fate and Aldis Hodge was incredible as Hawkman. Of course The Rock brings a lot to the screen as Black Adam

November 11-Wakanda Forever...loved it but the original was better...though with the death of T'Challa, there was virtually no chance of living up to that. Angela Bassett has been mentioned as an Oscar nominee for her role as the Queen Mother and while Namor has some comic inaccuracies, his motives made sense.


Moonfall...saw it on HBO a month or so ago...definitely an eye-opening disaster film with Halle Berry

The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent which I saw on TV a few weeks ago. It was pretty funny...Nick Cage seemingly made fun of his own idiosyncracies in playing a somewhat fictionalized version of himself.

League Of SuperPets which I saw on HBOMax....it was cute and funny...THe Rock as Krypto and Kevin Hart as Ace were highlights...they make a hell of a duo

Uncharted...just saw it on Netflix this weekend and I thought it was really good...kept me on the edge of my seat

Lost City....just saw it on EPIX and it was kinda silly...a romance novelist gets kidnapped and forced to look for a treasure she writes about it her latest book and the cover model for her books has to actually be the hero his character is

Morbius...just saw it on Netflix this weekend and it was ok but didn't excite me in the least...the release was delayed 6 times and while I didn't hate it, they could've kept delaying it

Tuesday, November 15, 2022

some days

I feel like the only thing keeping me going is Jared and Jensen. If not for them I don't know what I would do...whether I would be around much longer